Speaking of home, I only have 26 more days until I am boarding a plan to go home. That's so weird for me to think about. Well, there's a lot of things that are weird for me to think about. The other day we were at Wal-Mart and I was telling Maria about how weird it is to look back and think about where I was when I first got here verses where I am now. Like now, everything feels normal and not as exciting as it was when I first got here. Puerto Rico has just come to feel like my home. I still miss my friends and family and everything like crazy, but this just feels normal now. When I first got here, I remember being so lost and not being able to understand anything and now (for the most part) it's no big deal. Now I know how to get around a grocery store, ask for help when I need it, respond to people when they talk to me, and I have friends. I think one of the reasons that it feels like normal is because this summer is kind of turning out how every other summer goes: I want to hang out with people but everyone is usually busy. The only difference is that I'm not working, I don't have a car, I'm not living on campus, and I'm doing more than I usually do. I'm still hanging out with the same amount of people though. I've been trying to get more people to hang out though since I'm only here for a few more weeks and I don't know when I'll be able to see them next-- if ever. But especially now that it's starting to get so close, I've been thinking a lot about how things were when I first got here compared to now. I may not feel like it most of the time but I'm a lot more confident in myself and my Spanish. At the moment I'm just frustrated with my lack of speaking. I've gone back to speaking mostly in English with Maria and so I just feel like my speaking is now lacking behind the rest of everything. But I guess that's still part of the learning process. At some point in my life I really do need to force myself to do this. I do think that I could survive in a completely Spanish-speaking country now. I'm not sure what I'm going to do, but I have faith that the universe will bring me to where I need to go. |
But one final thing that I would like to share about the ceremony was that I got to dance with my hoop again! This time I danced for Boinayel, the Taino god of the rain. It was interesting, because usually I have a very distinct flow, but I have noticed that every time that I dance for the gods my flow is different depending on the god/goddess that I am dancing for. Last time, my flow was a but more from the element of air as I was dancing to the sun god. This time, my flow was very water-like. I'd like to think that it's because that good comes into me and expresses themself through me. I did have an issue with trying not to fall because the ground was uneven and my sandals were wet and breaking, but I was still able to find flow. And that's something very important to me because I haven't really been able to hoop or find my flow since it started getting really hot here. So that's definitely one thing that I really can't wait for back home. But I guess we'll see what happens at my next, and probably last, Wiccan ceremony here in Puerto Rico. Of course I will be blogging about it! And like I said: I hope to find and put up pictures from this ceremony. Maybe they'll even have something of me hula hooping!
XOXO Ericka